Isabelle Marie

Yesterday morning (May 22, 2016), at 10:16am, we welcomed our second beautiful daughter into the world!

Everyone meet Isabelle Marie Winterstein :)

She's already filled our lives with more joy and love than we could have imagined. Abigail is a phenomenal big sister and we can't wait to go home tomorrow and get our new normal figured out :).

 

I will post more later with many more photos, details, etc :). For now, I'm going to try and squeeze in little bitty naps when possible... It's been a few days since I've slept! 

 

Relaxing while waiting...

Ahh....I'm currently relaxing in a nice warm bath while Abby naps. This is so beyond needed for me. The past few days I've really let myself be my own worst enemy. I've been way too focused on trying to induce this labor naturally that it's pretty much taken over my mind. I was in such a funk yesterday, which I blame myself for. Sure, I've been pretty miserable. My back pain at night is keeping me from getting any sleep. My tailbone pain is stopping me from even wanting to sit down, and definitely making standing up dreadful. And I've had some of the worst crotch pain of my life...but I won't go into that! Haha. On top of it all, the past week has been filled with nausea and a total lack of appetite. So yeah, none of that is fun. But I'm still trying to remind myself that this could be the last time I'm ever pregnant. And that's pretty crazy to think. Despite the pain, I want to treasure these last moments of feeling a baby moving inside me. I want to embrace how amazing my body is for being capable of carrying and growing a life inside of it. It might not be comfortable, but it's more than worth it!

 

I'm also a little thankful that I've gotten to this point of misery. It's made the whole "Abby not being my only baby" thing a little easier on me lately. I was initially feeling guilt over it - thinking the transition would be difficult for her and that I needed to soak up these last moments with just her. I still want to soak them up, but I'm in so much pain that it's taking away from my time with her. I'm not able to chase her around the house as easily. I can't bounce her on the yoga ball like she wants because my belly gets in the way. And the most simple of all, I'm not able to comfortably snuggle her on the couch because we don't both fit very well and can't get comfy. Once baby Isabelle is here, I can snuggle my little girl again! Sure, I might be exhausted at times...but at least I'll feel good enough to sit on the floor and play with my beautiful two-year-old.

 

So for now we wait! My body is progressing and telling us that it's ready for Izzy's arrival. It's just up to her when she decides to make her grand debut! We are ready and excited. :) Until she arrives, I will continue to pray for patience and peace while trying to relax and enjoy these last moments as a family of three! 

 

Still pregnant!

Here I am, laying in bed, 37 1/2 weeks pregnant! As of Wednesday, I was 3 1/2cm dilated and 80% effaced. The doctor said I could go into labor any day. If I'm still pregnant by my next appointment on Wednesday, she is going to sweep my membranes in hopes to jump start something. I know I technically still have almost three weeks until my due date, but the baby is a good size and my body seems to be getting itself plenty ready. My tailbone, pelvic region, and back can't handle being pregnant much longer! So here's to hoping we get to meet this little girl soon. 

 

Abigail had a bit of a tough week this week. She was pretty emotional and a little irritable for several days. We all thought she was just sensing that things were going to change soon with Isabelle coming and whatnot. She was also refusing to eat most things we'd offer her. After waking up from her nap one day, she told me she was hurting. A little while later, when taking her potty, she began to cry and told me it hurt. It was so sad! I got her into the doctor that day and sure enough - my baby had a UTI. We had to catheterize her at the doctors. It was awful. But she's now had three doses of her antibiotics and is seeming much more like her normal and happy self. I'm so glad I trusted my instincts and got her in to the doctor so quickly! My poor little girl.

 

Good news! Our neighborhood added another park down the road from us. It's probably about a 3/4 mile walk, which is perfect for some exercise while I'm trying to induce this labor ;). Abigail got to go twice today, which she loved! 

 

She's just the sweetest, silliest, and most adorable little girl. I can't believe we are Blessed enough to be getting another wonderful little gal!! I'm feeling so many emotions with this being so close to reality now.

I love my little family so much. 

So in love

Today is one of those days where I feel emotional thinking about how much I love Abigail. It's a strange feeling when you love someone so much that it is almost painful. Painful in a good way, of course. 

 

This little girl has completed my life in so many ways and I'm filled with so much joy just by looking at her. Thinking about how much I love her almost brings me to tears. She is so amazing. I can't believe that my heart is going to feel this way for two kids soon! How crazy is that?!

 

Days like these are wonderful. 

A challenging day

Abigail was a little challenging today.

First, she wanted nothing to do with her breakfast. So we caved and finally set the plate on the coffee table desperate to get her to eat something to start off her day.

Then, I ran an errand with a friend this morning so daddy took Abby to the park. When they returned home, she was refusing to lay down for her nap, constantly claiming she needed to potty. But she'd sit there forever and nothing would happen. I think someone was delaying her nap on purpose ;).

After sleeping for a solid three hours, she woke up very emotional. She couldn't seem to pull it together. She even passed out from crying so hard because mean-old-mommy put clothes on her! After that whole ordeal, we went to the beach and had a great couple of hours.

When we got home a little later, she again decided that she wasn't going to eat dinner. We ended up showering and relaxing later, and that was wonderful. We also got to video chat with my sister, which was great.  But the poor girl decided to cry when I said it was time for bed (which is very unusual for her). Honestly, I considered bringing her into my bed and letting her sleep with me. We never do that, but it was awfully tempting! But I was in so much pain & I haven't been sleeping well, so I needed to get her down so that I could relax and try to feel some relief. 

Days like these can be challenging, but they also remind me of how great I have it most days. These days are rare for us. We are extremely Blessed to have a happy and pretty easy-going kiddo. She's always very strong-willed and can be a bit stubborn, but I wouldn't change that for the world. I think she's going to grow up to do great things and I'm excited to watch with pride. 

Oh, and did I mention that tonight was the second night in a row that as I'm walking out of her room at bedtime, I've overheard her saying, "thank you Jesus." MELTS MY HEART! How precious is that?! I must be doing something right :).

My payment

It's 3am and I am unable to sleep. I'm uncomfortable, my back hurts, and my heartburn is really acting up...pregnancy sure can be glamorous ;).

I read an article a bit ago about stay-at-home mom's and their "worth." It talked about how a lot of stay-at-home mom's feel the need to compare their days and hours to day cares and such to show "the money they are saving them and how valuable their time is."

It got me thinking...isn't my time at home with Abigail payment in itself? Getting to be there when she says each new word or phrase, being there hug and kiss her when she feels pride in achieving something that she feels is worth celebrating, and being her rock for when she's needing a little extra TLC. There's timess where out of nowhere, for no apparant reason, all she wants is to snuggle on my lap. Although I know Dan loves his job, I also know that he would kill to have some of these special moments with her. Time is something we can never get back. As each moment passes, we're all getting older and we can only look back on the memories we've made. I am so grateful that I'm able to stay at home at this point in our life and raise our daughter. Being her "person" in life right now is worth more to me than any amount of money.

I love my little girl :)

Shoutout to my Folks :)

Today is one of those days that I'm feeling extra thankful. 

I am so grateful to have two parents in my life that have always taught me to stay positive, stay strong, and to do everything with optimism, love, and a joyful attitude. My parents have been extremely supportive of my life and I am so grateful for that. 

When I wanted to pursue something in school, they supported me. When I wanted to get a new job, they were happy for me. When I got married, they made sure to make that one of the best days of my life. And when I had Abigail, they were her biggest fans and made me feel so proud of what I had created and accomplished. They still make me feel like I'm a great mother and wife, and their validation means so much to me. Having their support with this pregnancy has been a Blessing, too. I love that they trust in Dan and I to make our own decisions, and are there beside us if we ever need them. I'm so thankful to have grown up in a stable household with a family that loved and supported me in each stage of life. They are still this way with both my sister and I. Having role models like that in life sure makes being a mother easier. If Abigail and Isabelle grow up respecting and adoring me half as much as I do my own mother, I will be so happy.

Not only are they great parents, they are wonderful grandparents. Abigail loves them so much, and I know Isabelle will too :). Whether it's a quick "hello" on FaceTime, or a visit to their house...she loves her time with Mimi and Grandpa. 

Knowing that they moved up to Washington to be closer to Lindsay (my sister) and I gives me such comfort in day-to-day things. There such a safety and reassurance for me in having my parents close by. Living in a separate state from them for four years was tough for me! I'm not at all ashamed to say that I rely on seeing my parents often. 

So mom and dad....I can't thank you enough for being my biggest cheerleaders through life. You are both so amazing and I'm so happy to have you as my parents and friends! I love you so much more than I could ever begin to explain.

(Sorry this was so jumbled and if it seems as though I'm rambling. I'm tired and am battling a headache tonight...but I felt the need to get out what was going through my head) :)

A full heart

People so often talk about how "difficult motherhood is." Sure, there are challenging days. And there are definitely moments where you find yourself contradicting your words, your parenting beliefs, or your rules just to make a specific moment in time easier. It's a lot of work to teach a tiny little human to grow up with manners, respect, and Grace, while still mixing in the normal everyday silliness that they so naturally have inside of them. And not to mention the attitudes and tantrums that they are capable of. It is definitely a full-time job of its own.

But as a lay in bed tonight thinking of my little Abigail, all I can think of is how much better my life is because of her. I definitely go to bed feeling more exhausted than I ever have before, but that's because I had a day full of moments, memories, laughs, and sure, some struggles...all of which with a little girl that fills my heart with joy and love. Getting out of the house to do anything simple, whether it be to play at the beach for an hour or even going to the grocery store, all take a lot more work than before having her. But it seems so small in comparison to the happiness she brings me with her witty remarks as I'm pushing her in the shopping cart, or when I see that huge smile on her face as she runs along the sand. It doesn't take much to please her. A few crackers to snack on, some rocks to play with, and a mommy who sits and engages with her is more than enough to keep her fully entertained and excited. How could I ever complain about that?! That's all I need to fill my afternoon with happiness. In ways, life is much simpler now that I have her. I appreciate the little moments so much more than I would have prior to becoming a mommy. 

My heart is filled with so much love that at times it feels like it could burst. And to think we're adding to that with another beautiful little girl just makes me smile. Parenting can sure take a lot out of ya, but it puts way more back into my heart and I wouldn't change a moment of it. 

From One to Two

I'm laying here, in bed, feeling Isabelle move around in my stomach. I just got Abigail to bed a little bit ago after about an hour of much-needed snuggling on the couch. She isn't always that way, but for some reason tonight she just wanted mommy to hold her tight and close...and I loved it. 

As I lay here feeling Isabelle move, I can't think of how different my life will be once she's in the real world with us all. We will have two children. That's crazy to think about. But what's harder for me is accepting the fact that Abigail will no longer be my only baby. She's not going to have 100% of my undivided attention every day when daddy is gone at work. She will have to share me, and I will also have to share her. It's so exciting thinking that we are providing her with a lifelong best friend. Having a sister is one of the biggest Blessings that life can bring you. But for some reason I lay here feeling guilty knowing that I only have 9 short weeks with her...just her. 

Don't get me wrong, I can't wait to meet Isabelle and for our family and love to grow. I know that the moment I meet this baby girl, I will love her just as I love Abigail. But I truly believe there is a special kind of bond and love between Abigail and I that no one will ever be able to take. She is the little girl that made me a mommy. She is the reason I am now a softer yet stronger, more loving person than I ever knew possible for myself. She may not be my "only baby" for much longer, but she will always be my "first." Becoming a mother has taught me that the amount of love I have in my heart is unmeasurable. And I know it will continue to surprise me as our family grows. I'm so eternally grateful to have Dan by my side through it all.

For the next nine weeks, I plan to continually treasure each moment I have with my little family of three (plus Charlie). We have a beautiful life and I'm so thankful I'm able to create such wonderful memories with Abby before she becomes a big sister. She amazes me each and every day with her intelligence, wittiness, silliness, and loving heart. She's such a beautiful little soul and brings me so much happiness. 

Although I'm in a lot more pain than I care to go into, I'm in no hurry for these 9 weeks to fly by. Each day that passes, though it may be uncomfortable, is a new opportunity for me to love on and soak up time with my first born :). 

I may not have this all figured out just yet....but I know  one thing for sure: becoming a mommy is what I was meant to do. God had this plan for me and I plan on making him proud. 

Some time with daddy :)

Dan had last weekend off, so we got to spend some fun time with him! We went to the zoo and also went to Belmont Park, where he & Abby rode on some little rides. She loved the rides at the park! 

Another Friday is now upon us, and unfortunately Dan works all weekend. Not sure what Abigail and I have planned, but I'm sure we will think of something :). 

In the meantime, I have an OB checkup this morning. I'm really excited for it actually. There's nothing better than a doctor confirming that you and baby are doing well! We're 30 1/2 weeks in....getting so close, and I'm getting so big!

Here's a few photos from our week:

2 weeks in!

We've been in San Diego for a couple full weeks now. We are taking full advantage of the sunshine by being outside as much as possible. We've taken many trips down to the park, the bay (we prefer the bay over the beach - much easier/safer with Abigail and also more dog friendly), a couple different trips to the zoo, and even a trip to the safari park! Abigail is loving all the time spent outdoors. I think one of her favorite things is "chasing Charlie" down the sand. 

Here's just a few photos from the trip this far:

As for me...I'm feeling pretty good.

Other than awful insomnia and crotch pain, my pregnancy is going really well! Baby Isabelle is constantly moving around, and her movements are getting so strong! We are in the 29th week of my pregnancy - almost the home stretch! It's crazy to think I still have ten weeks of growing to do! 

Dan is still working swing shift, keeping him busy from about 2pm - 1am. Meaning Abigail and I are getting lots of alone time. Our friends, Kendra and McKenna have definitely helped keep us company though, and I'm so thankful for that!

 By the time Abby has dinner and we get ready for bed, I'm pretty wiped out. Turns out being pregnant while spending the days out in the sun, chasing around a dog and a 2-year-old, can really wear a person out! I've been embracing Abigails 7:30pm bedtime ;). 

Because it hasn't been allowing me to post on here for a while, I'm feeling a little behind.

My sister had to undergo surgery this week to remove fibroids and polyps in her reproductive organs. No fun! They also discovered that she does in fact have endometriosis...which is a total bummer! Thankfully, it's not too advanced yet. She's been having pain for a while now, so I'm glad she finally has an answer as to why. She is doing well and is recovering at my parents house for a little extra help and support.

My mom has been over to our house many times to check on things, and is even doing a little cleaning and redecorating for us. Yes - I told her it was okay ;). My mom and I have very similar taste in most things, so I trust her! When she mentioned that she had a few ideas for sprucing up the house as a surprise for us, I didn't hesitate! She's pretty awesome and I'm so thankful for her!

Well, that pretty much wraps up all of the updates that I can think of. I will keep attempting to update a bit more often in hopes that it will let me upload new posts! I hope everyone is having a great day! 

So far, so good.

We've been in San Diego for a few days now.

Abigail has done amazing with the sleeping routine. I'm surprised at how well she's adapted considering it's a brand new place, bed, etc. The only bummer about bed time is that because Dan is working swings, I'm pretty bored from about 7:30pm on. I've been getting tired pretty early which has helped, but I'm not able to sleep well. I've always dealt with insomnia, but it's even worse with this pregnancy!

Speaking of.... I'm 27 1/2 weeks now! Last week in my second trimester! Pretty crazy. 

All in all, we are loving the trip so far! Abigail LOVES playing in the sand. She constantly says she's "building sandcastles." We also have friends here, which is awesome! My friend Kendra is here with her husband, who is also working swings. They have a one-year-old daughter named McKenna. Abby gets excited when I tell her we get to hang out with "baby Kenna." It's cute to see them interact and having them to hang out with has been so nice! 

Here's a few photos from the past couple of days. 

WE MADE IT!

About 1,250 miles later, we've arrived to our house in sunny San Diego! 

Thank goodness this little beauty is AMAZING in the car! She was so happy the whole way - hard to believe, huh? She's so full of joy and it made both Dan & and myself so proud, thankful, and happy. 

For the first 12 days here we are staying in a smaller one-bedroom place. That has definitely made "settling in" a bit on the tougher side. Three people in one small closet & end table makes for quite the [lack of] organization. But we can see the ocean out of one window, and the bay out of another...so you won't hear me complain! We move into a larger two-bedroom place for the remaining month, just down the street! We've officially done our grocery shopping and gotten our essentials, so now we really get to relax and enjoy the trip (aside from Dan working). Thankfully he enjoys the work and the people here! 

We started our first morning by taking a walk down the bay side of the peninsula. It's a beautiful day here today! 

Abigail insists on having her hat and sunglasses when we leave the house - which is A-OK by me! I love how much she loves the outdoors and this beautiful sunny weather. Sounds like we're supposed to get several days of rain coming soon, so I'm very thankful our first full day here was beautiful. 

So for now, it's going to take a little adjusting to get Abby used to the sleeping arrangements...but everything is going good thus far! I already miss my family but I know I'll see them soon :). Very thankful to my parents who are keeping an eye on the house as well as keeping Abigail's fishy friend, Dewey, alive while we're gone. Abby already requested to see him, so Mimi had to send a couple photos. She's getting too smart! 

I'll check in again soon! Happy Tuesday everyone! 

Be-YOU-tiful!

Good morning, everyone! I woke up feeling much better today. I hope you all have a wonderful day in this wonderfully strange world ;). Remember - you're brilliant and beautiful! Now go do something that your future self with thank you for :).

Staying Positive

Between a tough doctor visit today, sleep deprivation, and a huge dinner time battle, I'm pretty exhausted and a bit emotionally drained. Abigail has definitely entered the two's in more ways than one. Don't get me wrong, she's a wonderful little girl and I feel so fortunate because she's so happy-natured and really well-behaved most days. But there are still exhausting moments. And knowing that she's sick (ear/sinus infections and a yucky cough) and not feeling well on top of the meltdowns make it a bit harder. So tonight, I'm going to look at these pictures that I took from our walk today, smile at the sight of her smile, and thank God for another day with my wonderful little family. Life may not always be perfect, but that's perfectly okay with me! I have what I need and love in life the most, and I wouldn't change that for the world. 

Mothers Pride

Isn't it funny what makes us proud as mothers? Or more generically speaking, as parents?! I used to take pride in getting a good job, accomplishing a goal that I had dreamed of for a while, and so on. Nowadays? I find myself feeling so proud of the smallest things that Abigail does. Whether it's going potty, saying a new word or expression, or watching her help me clean up a spill...I am filled with joy and pride. Today, it was watching her focus on trying to draw pictures while we were getting our taxes done. 

I have never seen her so focused on something. She was "checking" off the boxes on the checklist, then "drew" a picture of Charlie (our dog) along with J.D. and Maddie (my parents dogs). She was so proud to show me her scribbles, which in turn made me so proud of her. I love watching her imagination grow, along with her focus. She amazes me more every day and I'm so proud to be her mommy. 

Upcoming Trip & A New Do! :)

I'm not one to complain, but bear with me. Since people choose if they want to read this or not, I'm just going to let it out!

This winter and pregnancy have both been tough on me. For starters, the entire first trimester was awful. I was sick and tired all day, every day. Taking care of a toddler and trying to move, settle, and maintain our home on top of those things made for a pretty rough few months. 

Then, once I began to feel a bit better, our house got hit with the flu, norovirus, and a cold! All back to back. To say the least, it wasn't fun. Thankfully those things are behind us now (aside from a little cough and snot on Abby's behalf). We are SO thankful to have our health back! 

We just got our final orders (finally) and our trip to San Diego is confirmed!! We are going to be in San Diego from Feb 29-April 15. We decided instead of staying in Coronado this time that we wanted to mix it up and stay on Mission Beach. I have a friend staying there during the same time, too, which will be a lot of fun for me! 

~here's a photo of Mission Beach~

~looks rough, right?!~

I'm quite the homebody in the sense that I like the security of being close to home, but even more so, close to family. I'm not the type of person that enjoys a lot of time to myself. I've always been an extrovert and no matter how exhausted or how many kids I have, I don't see that changing ;).  Since I've been stuck in a bit of a rut this winter between pregnancy "blah's" and the yucky germs going around, I'm pretty excited for a change of scenery and some healing Vitmain D! 

That all being said....I had another boost in my mood yesterday. :) My sister has been doing hair for a while now, and she's really turned out to be an amazing hairstylist. I told her I've been feeling like I need a change, and that I wanted to brighten things up a bit just in time to leave for sunny California! I swear hairstylists are miracle workers ;). 

She totally took me from "drab" to "fab." I don't need to look a certain way to feel good about who I am, and I hope that's not the message that I'm portraying. This just put an extra pep in my step yesterday and gave me back a little spark that I've been missing! And seriously....how talented is she?! I'm so proud of her. She's always been the "artistic" one of us, and I'm so happy to see her using that talent.

So...thank you sis for making me feel a little better about myself, and for giving me an extra boost in confidence before I leave for our trip! 

An early morning!

Good morning, friends and family! Our day began at 4:45am today, thanks to this new "big-girl bed" thing. Abigail decided that she was well-rested before the sun even came up, and came galavanting into our room, ready to "feed Charlie and watch Mickey Mouse" before my eyes were fully open. We had a full bacon & eggs breakfast eaten by 6:45am! Then we were dressed and off for a day of nannying by 7:15am. We get to hang out with two cute little boys every other Friday for a little extra spending money & it helps out a friend of mine...it's a win-win :). 

As I sit here, sleep deprived from a poor nights sleep, I can't help but laugh thinking that this is God's way of preparing me for the new baby. I've always been one to suffer from insomnia, but it's been on a new level lately. Nothing like a big 'ol belly, awkward pregnancy dreams, a super active unborn baby, and a 2-year old that has a cold AND is adjusting to being out of her crib to help contribute to restless nights. ;) 

Speaking of the "big girl bed," let me touch on that! Abigail has officially slept 4 (maybe 5, but I can't remember) nights in it all by herself! Those who know me know that I'm pretty firm on having an "independent sleeper." I've never wanted her to require a fancy routine of any sort (whether it be the lighting, noises, us laying with her, etc.) to fall asleep. We say our prayer with her each night (which she now says with us - and it's ADORABLE), kiss her, lay her down, and simply walk out. She's been a dream at bedtime. I would never judge another family for choosing to co-sleep, etc, that's just not for us.  We had a couple really rough nights at first, one of which Abby and I were up from 11pm on until the next full day! But the last couple of nights, I've watched her (thank you, video monitor) soothe herself both when she's initially going to sleep and when she wakes up throughout the night. It's hard to believe that our little baby girl is growing up to become such a smart, self-sufficient toddler! 

Anyways, back to today.... We got out the door a couple minutes late, much thanks to the front door for jumping in front of Abigail as she walked outside ;). Poor girl ran RIGHT into the open door, bouncing her head off of it so hard that she got knocked onto her butt, hitting the back of her head on the wall inside the house. It wasn't one of her most coordinated moments. Turns out, she does take after her momma in some ways! :) We are now at the boys' house, playing with lots of toys and working on our sharing skills! Hanging out with a 4-year old and a baby under 1 are both great for Abigail, teaching her a good combination of sharing, learning new words and skills, while learning to be gentle and help with a baby, too. As much as we love it, I'm going to stop once baby Isabelle gets here. I want to be sure to focus on my girls and get into a routine of our own, while figuring out how to be the best mother of two that I can be! 

I hope you all are having a great day so far, and that it continues to get better and better! It is FRIDAY! So it can't be too bad, right?! :)

~just being silly in the early hours of the morning~